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07/02/19
JUNE IS A GREAT TIME FOR READING.
In Australia it’s too cold to do anything else. On the other side of the world it’s too hot. The above picture takes me back two years when I was bedded down in the Victorian snow fields. The drizzling rain had made the slopes uncomfortable and the barman’s strike at my lodge gave me few options. At the time I was weaning myself off the enduring adventures of Paddy Pest and looking for an alternative bunny to share some of the limelight.
Over dinner that evening I met this charming lady who had arrived at the chalet with a friend of mine. I couldn’t get over the fact that she appeared to have four breasts. As it turned out I was just pissed and seeing double (the barman had relented and got back on the horse). Nevertheless, it gave me the impetus to go where I had never been before. If your story is going to incorporate ladies with surplus mammaries, there is only one outlet for this kind of thing – Science Fiction.
“The Replicants” turned out to be a winner and I couldn’t speak more highly of the fellow who gave it a ripper review. It is true that I may have offended a few aficionados with my somewhat satirical view of these folks from another world but you can’t please all the people all the time. I take some pride in the fact that the book remains popular with kids who like Mars bars. “The Snoodle Contract” is also solid holiday reading and I regret not getting Bill Clinton or Donald Trump on board. That James Patterson, the biggest selling writer of all time, is an opportunist. I am reliably informed that my story about an assassination attempt on the U.S. president might give him a run for his money, so let’s not beat about the bush. Send my book to Washington – please.
Over dinner that evening I met this charming lady who had arrived at the chalet with a friend of mine. I couldn’t get over the fact that she appeared to have four breasts. As it turned out I was just pissed and seeing double (the barman had relented and got back on the horse). Nevertheless, it gave me the impetus to go where I had never been before. If your story is going to incorporate ladies with surplus mammaries, there is only one outlet for this kind of thing – Science Fiction.
“The Replicants” turned out to be a winner and I couldn’t speak more highly of the fellow who gave it a ripper review. It is true that I may have offended a few aficionados with my somewhat satirical view of these folks from another world but you can’t please all the people all the time. I take some pride in the fact that the book remains popular with kids who like Mars bars. “The Snoodle Contract” is also solid holiday reading and I regret not getting Bill Clinton or Donald Trump on board. That James Patterson, the biggest selling writer of all time, is an opportunist. I am reliably informed that my story about an assassination attempt on the U.S. president might give him a run for his money, so let’s not beat about the bush. Send my book to Washington – please.
Written by:
Gerry Burke
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